maybe i AM wierd after all
wanted to put another song here but after some unforseen responses when i put part of it as my msn nick... i think i wont haha.
anyway, today was a pretty productive day! tho i went like one hour late due to oversleeping (my old phone has a super sucky wake up tone... today i was reminded why esmond had to call me everyday in the second half of j2 to make sure i wake up on time for school) and poor mike had to mug alone till i arrived heh. but we had a productive day!yeah and i was reminded why i like talking to him so much haha. :) hopefully tml will be just as good heh. study buddies!
after mugging i decided to spend some quality time with the twins since it wasnt that late... and i realised that there is something abit wrong with me. i dont think i do it on purpose but its like there is something inside of me wanting to hurt myself. and so i blade at full speed in dark places even tho i know there are twigs and stuff there tt could trip me if i cant see them, and i do reckless things like jay-blade right in front of cars. and i dunno its not like i want to hurt myself, its more like i want to know how it feels. like i want to know how it feels to be truly hungry, and see how long i can last eating one meal a day(not too long haha) today i was almost fainting while blading and i just kept forcing myself to go faster. wierd stuff la. no need for anyone to get worried, im not becoming a psycho or something its just like i wanna know how it feels to do stuff. i wanna know how it feels to have a really really bad fall, to break a limb, to get run down by a car, to do something really bad to myself which im not going to say here, etc etc. i know that i wont la but sometimes i think that maybe if it does happen, i will feel exhilarated and i cant help but want to try haha. i guess thats where it came from, curiosity killed the cat.
maybe its just that its times like that that make you feel alive.
aiyah whatever la clearly im a lama
hmmm after i posted this i realised tt it sounds kinda depressive and i could so see pple telling me i shldnt be saying things like that. my repsonse to that is: why not! as long as i dont say anything illegal (Singapore's my hometown, its here i belong!), i dont see why i cant write whatever i want here. so if u dont like it then too bad for u
anyway, today was a pretty productive day! tho i went like one hour late due to oversleeping (my old phone has a super sucky wake up tone... today i was reminded why esmond had to call me everyday in the second half of j2 to make sure i wake up on time for school) and poor mike had to mug alone till i arrived heh. but we had a productive day!yeah and i was reminded why i like talking to him so much haha. :) hopefully tml will be just as good heh. study buddies!
after mugging i decided to spend some quality time with the twins since it wasnt that late... and i realised that there is something abit wrong with me. i dont think i do it on purpose but its like there is something inside of me wanting to hurt myself. and so i blade at full speed in dark places even tho i know there are twigs and stuff there tt could trip me if i cant see them, and i do reckless things like jay-blade right in front of cars. and i dunno its not like i want to hurt myself, its more like i want to know how it feels. like i want to know how it feels to be truly hungry, and see how long i can last eating one meal a day(not too long haha) today i was almost fainting while blading and i just kept forcing myself to go faster. wierd stuff la. no need for anyone to get worried, im not becoming a psycho or something its just like i wanna know how it feels to do stuff. i wanna know how it feels to have a really really bad fall, to break a limb, to get run down by a car, to do something really bad to myself which im not going to say here, etc etc. i know that i wont la but sometimes i think that maybe if it does happen, i will feel exhilarated and i cant help but want to try haha. i guess thats where it came from, curiosity killed the cat.
maybe its just that its times like that that make you feel alive.
aiyah whatever la clearly im a lama
hmmm after i posted this i realised tt it sounds kinda depressive and i could so see pple telling me i shldnt be saying things like that. my repsonse to that is: why not! as long as i dont say anything illegal (Singapore's my hometown, its here i belong!), i dont see why i cant write whatever i want here. so if u dont like it then too bad for u
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